Robbie Gwinn
Throughout my childhood I was lucky to be raised in a Christian home. I went to church with my family and youth club on Wednesday nights. At the end of my fifth grade year in the Bible study my teacher explained to the other 8 kids and me what it means to have a personal relationship with Jesus and be a Christian. I'll never forget what she said. She said that the most important thing that I can do in my life is to ask Jesus Christ into my life as my life-long leader and friend, and to have a relationship with Him. The second most important thing she said was to choose your friends wisely. I knew at that young age that I did not have a personal relationship with Jesus, I needed him throughout my life, and that I wanted to experience the great things that Jesus could bring into my life if I knew Him. When my Mom drove me out of the parking lot that night, I remember telling her that I asked Jesus into my life. My mom was thankful and excited, but it mostly amounted to a fulfilling sense of warmth and love that I felt at that moment.
How I came to know Christ:
Do you know when you live next door or with someone, but you don't really know who they are? You may not know what they value in life, what is most important to them, and what their inner secrets are. Sometime we really don't really know who your brother or sister or parents are, even though we may live with them. Throughout middle school I went to church and youth groups religiously and read the Bible maybe a few times a week. I knew it was the word of God, and I was content with my faith and relationship with Jesus. In high school I became more diligent as I attended Bible studies, joined a youth group, and became a Fellowship of Christian Athletes leader at my high school. In the year 2000 (the end of my junior year and the first half of my senior year), Jesus really wanted to show Himself to me, and that year I had the best relationship experience with Him to date. I experienced who God is in an interactive personal relationship. One might think that something fantastic happened, but in actuality my Dad, who was very close to me, died from cancer in December of that year. It doesn't do justice to talk about the whole year in only a few minutes, because there were so many happenings where I saw God working through family, friends and me. Even though Dad was in constant pain and it seemed like my life was falling apart, I couldn't help but know that Jesus was in control of the situation. God spoke to me through a dream, He gave me relationships that helped me cope and see Him more clearly, and I could see Him working in my family and friends. Since I knew my friends, family, and doctors were only human, I knew the only person who I could look for guidance and healing from was Jesus Himself. One verse that became very meaningful to me is Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." I often think of this verse during many difficult times in my life. No matter hard I tried to figure out why exactly God was doing this I had to trust and have faith in my leader in life and creator (the one who gives life and takes it away) in what he was doing. Someone once told me that God gives you as much as you can handle THROUGH Jesus. Even though there were many times where I was mad at Him (just like any relationship) He was always the one I would turn to when I needed comfort and a solid faith to stand on. I knew if Jesus miraculously healed Dad, people would see how Jesus heals, answers prayer, and is in control. Reading the Bible and finding comforting Bible verses, hearing sermons at church, praying in groups or by myself, and hearing daily that someone was praying for my family and me strengthened my relationship with God. I was excited to have Christ in my life and I knew that people who knew my family would know God by experiencing the healing power of Jesus. On the Friday night before my father went to heaven I came into the hospital room with my girlfriend Liz so we could have some quiet time with Dad. I had several questions that I wanted to discuss with Dad about life that I hadn't asked him before. I first asked him, "How do you know when you find the right women?" After a long pause from drug effects and tumors in his jaw my Dad said the most wise, yet simple answer. He said, "Pray." That was the last word that I heard from my father who meant the world to me. Forty hours later he was not on this world, but he was healed, free from suffering and present in heaven with Jesus.
My life after I came to know Christ:
After seeing my father take his last breathe I was definitely a changed man. I realized that I should be thankful for everything that I have, because everything that I have is from God. I realized that life can be much shorter than we think, and that NOW is the best time to think about and act upon things that are stirring in my heart. I learned never to hold back from telling a person I cared and loved them. I also learned that I should look at where my relationship with Jesus was in my priorities in life. I know to never take anything for granted and as long as I continually give my life and life goals to Christ, I will see his good works and eventually see what He was doing in the year 2000 in my personal life. Lastly, I have often thought about heaven. I look forward to being there and I know that whenever God decides to take me from this life I will be in paradise with Jesus and Dad. One of many verses that mean so much to me is Philippians 1:21. Paul is writing from jail and yet encouraged by what Christ is going to do in his life and with the Philippians. He says, "For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain." I do my best to live for and with Jesus, because He died for me.
The Lord showed me who He really was during the year 2000. Now I want to know Him and his ways even more by trying to be like Jesus and experiencing a very close relationship with Him. At the end of last summer I realized that my relationship with Jesus had once again gone into neutral and I needed to change that. I told Jesus that I wanted to follow Him. God answered my prayer faster than I thought He would. He has given me confidence to be honest about my beliefs, and He has been opening the hearts of many of the guys in a weekly fraternity Bible study on my college campus at the University of Illinois. I am encouraged to follow Jesus and know for sure my life is with Christ and whenever my death comes it will be gain. I am really eager to see what Jesus will do in my life and I'm trying to get to know Him better daily!